Sunday, April 11, 2010

Black Devil Doll zero stars

Black Devil Doll is a movie that is so devoid of anything resembling entertainment that I can not figure out who this movie was made for. This is a movie that tries so hard to be outrageous that it fails, simply because being outrageous does not a movie make. To say the least, Black Devil Doll is one of the worst movies I have ever seen. And trust me, I have seen some really terrible movies.

The movie starts out with a black militant being executed. Asked if he has any final words and he replies "I like to eat white butt". It was at this point that I wanted to turn the movie off, but for the sake of you, my faithful readers, I continued. We next cut to the main character, whose name I do not remember, writing in her journal. She narrates that she shouldn't have played with ouijia board because it ruined her life.

It is at this point that we are put into the movie's narrative structure: the old fashioned flashback. She uses the ouijia board and one of her dolls, that is white, turns into the Black Devil Doll. I perked up a little because this movie is sold as a horror movie and I figured that with the arrival of the executed militant's soul into the doll the killing would start. What I would come to realize though, is that the doll just wants to have sex.

And he does. He has sex with the main character, during a montage. Then he demands that the girl invite her friends over. She obliges and the Black Devil Doll proceeds to drug and rape her friends before killing them. Yes, there are killings in this movie, but they are proceeded with scenes of rape. The filmmakers seem to think that by having a doll do all of this, then it must be offensive. I perceived it as desperation. The filmmakers are so desperate to be shocking that they forgot how to make a good movie.

But that is going a bit too far because I am giving the notion that the filmmakers even now how to make a good movie. It is very apparent that they do not. What they do know is how to point the camera and shot something. This movie has no rhythm and no pacing. It goes from one scene to another, with no knowledge of what came before it. Scenes are staged so haphazardly that you wonder who financed this film.

Being shocking is an art form. You can't be shocking for the sake of being shocking. Some of the best movies that contain shock value do so because we have believable characters in order for the audience to have someone to relate to. Showing rape as shock value is just a excuse to show rape and that says something about the filmmakers. This movie shows that they would rather be pimps than filmmakers.

The audience for this appears to be rednecks, racists, and fans of rape. I'm sure that fans of B-movies will find this movie and be excited, like I was, at the possibility of spoof on horror movies. I fully expected this movie to be a low rent black Chucky, but the filmmakers have failed at that. In fact, they couldn't even come close, even if they tried. The filmmakers show that they do not understand what goes into making a movie and as an end result they turn to what they think is shocking, when in reality, the material is just plain dumb.

I am giving Black Devil Doll zero stars, not for the material, but for the way it is presented. It is clear that the filmmakers wanted to be offensive, but in order to that, you have to present something that is shocking. Seeing a doll have sex is not shocking. See this movie is not shocking. Knowing that this movie was made is not shocking. What is shocking is the fact that people are going to watch this movie and believe that they have seen something offensive. In a way they have. Black Devil Doll is offensive to people who have common sense. So, I guess the filmmakers did achieve something after all.


  1. Wow--you sat through that whole thing? Did you keep wondering if maybe it takes an amazing turn at some point or from minute one did you know it was a suck-fest? You are braver than me. I don't give movies too long before I turn them off and say "adios." It's folks with fortitude such as yourself who save the rest of us from misery. Thanks for the forewarning.

  2. Sounds like these guys made the same mistake Uwe Boll made with "Postal," only to a far greater degree. They tried so hard to be offensive that they forgot to make a good movie along the way. I haven't seen "Black Devil Doll," but your review makes me even more convinced that those who like to tar Boll as "the worst filmmaker ever" simply haven't watched enough movies to effectively judge what is and isn't total crap.

  3. Best movie of the year, you're a loser.

  4. Wow, you completely missed the point of this film. I am neither a red neck, a racist, or a rape fan. Well okay, I like me some film-rape. The film is not for douches. Best cult film in the last ten years. You are a loser and a pussy.